Part of her World
by Ash4
Summary: Saying any details would give my surprise away, so it's a non-canon character looking back on life.


Title: Part of her world  
  
Author: Ash (AshletX512@aol.com)  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Spoilers: Meow (nothing else), Pre Season 2  
  
POV: Try and guess (  
  
Author's Notes on bottom  
  
~~~~~  
  
For years, I felt dirty, like I couldn't wash enough. I knew too much, things I shouldn't know. Bad things that should not happen, much less be taught to a poor adolescent. As a child I didn't understand. I watched my dad work, he liked to take me to the lab, proud of what he was doing and loving that I was intrigued by is work. He never even told my mother what he did, she thought he worked in the shipping business. It was our secret.  
  
Through him, I was exposed to everything that went on there. At night, he would tell me stories about what happened during the day. I still remember vividly his story from one night in February 2009. He told me they escaped. I was upset by this. Even though I never had any contact with them, I felt like they were my friends. When my father went to business meetings, he would let me sit in the surveillance room. I watched them like they were characters on a TV show. Watching their every move, I began to know everything about them. By the time of their escape, I felt like I was the best friend they never knew they had.  
  
It wasn't until I was about 17 that I began to wonder why my best friends had run away from me, from their home. My dad had gotten me a job as an assistant in the building and I could go almost anywhere I wanted with the security clearance he gave me. Instead of hanging out in the surveillance rooms, I found myself in the testing labs. It was not until then that I realized why they had run away. Manticore no longer had the special appeal it had to me years before. Seeing what went on behind the scenes shocked and angered me. Everything my dad had told me of his projects to make people better were lies. As a child he told me the kids I watched on the screens were happy, that they wanted to be stronger and better. Now I knew that they were meant to kill and destroy.  
  
I lashed out. I began to hate my father and neglect my studies. I had graduated high school early and was studying biomedical engineering at the university. My dad convinced me it was the best major because I could soon work with him in the genetic labs. My mom didn't understand, she couldn't. She didn't know anything at all. She was convinced that I had fallen in with the bad crowd and was doing drugs. It was amazing that only a month earlier I was only the fast track to graduating with honors and following in my father's footsteps at Manticore.  
  
I dropped out of school, stole money from my parents, and ran away from my upper-class home in Wyoming to living wherever I could. I eventually settled in Seattle. But I still had my past tormenting me. I knew that I had never hurt the poor kids at the research facility, but I felt guilty about being associated with it. I hated my father, all the friends I had made there, and myself for not realizing what was going on and trying to stop it, even though I knew there was nothing I could've done. I no longer felt abandoned by my "friends" who had run away years earlier. They deserved their freedom as retribution for what they suffered at Manticore.  
  
I never really made any friends. I was drinking alone when I first saw her again. I couldn't believe my eyes. She was so beautiful and everything I imagined she would be after the 10 years since the escape. I have a photographic memory and remembered her face but wasn't sure it was really her. Her friend said something to her and she laughed, flipping her dark hair in the process. It was only for a second, but long enough for me to recognize the barcode that she hid underneath her hair.  
  
I wished I could reach out to her, touch her, be part of her world. I wondered all about her. Did anyone know her secret? I fought the urge to talk to her. I mentally slapped myself, reminding myself of the fact that I had nothing to say. I could just imagine it: "Hi, you don't know me but I know you. My father helped create you and I liked to spy on you through the surveillance cameras at Manticore. Can I buy you a drink?" He rolled his eyes, imaging her reaction. But maybe the last part could work. Before he could get over to her, a pager went off and she answered it.  
  
"It's Logan. Gotta blaze" she told her friends, leaving the bar.  
  
I didn't stop her and watched her leave. Logan was probably her boyfriend. I thought I would never see her again.  
  
~~~~~  
  
Two days later was my lucky day. I was delivering pizzas to pay for school. Only one more month until I could graduate and be an EMT. I figured medicine would work for me since I already had the background.  
  
"Did anyone order a large sausage? " I asked, stepping into Jam Pony.  
  
She approached me. "Hi." I couldn't believe it. The way she looked at me.well, it didn't seem like she had a boyfriend.  
  
"Max." Her friend stopped her, tugging on her arm.  
  
"What's your name?" X-5452, Max, asked me.  
  
"Rafer." I tell her.  
  
Her friend pulls her away. I wondered why, but I found out later.  
  
~~~~~  
  
After my shift, I was riding home to change before my class when I saw her again. We had the same taste in transportation. She gave me that look again. Traffic let up and her bike sped forward. It probably would've been better not to follow, but it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.  
  
My apartment was close by and it didn't take us long to get from the parking lot to the room. I figured that she was in heat, I had read about it in the files between the time of realizing Manticore's evil and running away. It was a good thing I had a condom or I would've been a father in 9 months.  
  
When I woke up in the morning she was gone. I had had one-night stands before but this time I was hurt when I found my bed empty in the morning. I ended up with a few bruises from her ferocity, but they faded quickly. My memory of her, however, did not. It was one of the best nights of my life.  
  
Sometimes I find myself at the bar again, watching her. I wonder if it wasn't for Manticore and her feline DNA if we ever would have hooked up.  
  
I sit in the back, sipping my beer. I want to tell her that I know who she is. That I know what she has done and that I don't care. I love her and I wonder if I'll ever get the chance to tell her. Will she ever let me be part of her world?  
  
~X~X~X~  
  
Author's Notes: Feedback please! Reviews are welcome, good or bad. This was my first DA fic. I wrote this just writing what came to my head without thinking. I wanted the POV to be from a non-canon character and didn't really think of Rafer until later. I like giving minor characters a background. 


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